Interview с Nanowar of Steel : DARKSIDE.ru

You have so far published all of your recordings yourselves, but “Other Bands Play, Nanowar Gay!!” has recently been re-released by the Russian label Mystic Empire. How did you get this record deal? Did you come to their office with great swords of steel and force them to sign the contract, or was it on their own initiative?

We got in contact with them through a medium. We went to a sorcerer, and he gave us Mystic Empire’s address. Pravda!!! (Russian for “it’s true” – ed.)

What about the rest of the world? Has there been any interest from other record labels, or do you think it’s more convenient and more true to release your CDs by yourselves?

It is more true to do by ourselves most of the things that we can do. Though there’s been interest from Sony, EMI… (everybody laughs) Well, in fact, we were contacted by a few small labels, but they were not true enough.

We’ve checked your website and seen that you play live very often. What is more interesting for you – to work in the studio or to bring your music live to the people?

We always bring people to the studio when we don’t play live! Seriously, we prefer to play live, because we break our balls playing in the studio!

“Other Bands Play, Nanowar Gay!!” was the first CD that you fully recorded in a studio. How does a true metal studio look like? What does it take from a studio to be suitable for you to work there?

How does a true metal studio look like? It looks like a bedroom! Seriously, we recorded the album in our guitarist’s studio, which is his computer and his bedroom. And we mixed it in 16th Cellar, which is the studio of Theatres Des Vampires, Iconoclast and other good bands from Italy. And Village People (disco stars of the late 1970s – ed.) recorded there too! (laughs)

Why did you use several additional drummers in the studio? What was Uinona Rider doing at that time, why couldn’t he play on all the songs?

He was masturbating!!! Uinona likes to play with his dick! (everybody laughs) On ochen krasny! (Russian for “it’s very red” – ed.)

Why taught you Russian?

This strange dictionary that we have here!

Are you sitting there with a dictionary?

Ne pravda!!! (everybody laughs)

OK, where did you get the girls for performing female vocals on the album? What is needed from a girl to take part in the recording of a Nanowar CD?

We took them from a road which is very famous here in Rome, it is called via Collatina. It is full of bitches. (everybody laughs) If we had wanted to hire a singer we would have had to pay almost 100 euros, while a bitch is only 50 euros, so we chose a cheaper way!

In g

eneral, how many girls are there in the audience when you play live? What can you say to the people who believe women can never understand true metal?

Do you mean girls or girls with a dick?

We mean girls!

You know, our drummer Uinona Rider enjoyed she-males so much. (a stuffed cry in the background) Did you hear this?

Yeah! (everybody laughs)

Girls are OK in heavy metal, we think that there should be more girls in heavy metal, because we need more girls. Yeah, yeah! And Russian girls are really awesome!

More about live shows – can you describe the best and the worst experience you have ever had on stage?

A dick in the popa! I took a dick in the popa, and it was awful! We think that’s the best and the worst part of the show! (everybody laughs) Feeling a big dick in your ass is very bad, but because of that the singer sings better! You can hear something like this: (next goes an almost ultrasonic scream) This is the sound of a broken popa! (everybody’s on the floor laughing) It’s broken like a mountain!

Everybody’s asking you about your attitude to Luca Turilli from Rhapsody, since you mention him in the song “King”. But do you know if Luca himself has heard Nanowar? Do you think he’s gonna like this song?

He was the former boyfriend of our drummer.

Oh, really? How interesting!

Yes, last year he was a former boyfriend. (everybody laughs) No, really, I don’t think he’s ever listened to our songs, and if he did, he didn’t get upset, because we have never received any threats from Rhapsody.

What do your friends and family think of Nanowar? Do they like true metal, or do they often say that you should stop wasting your time and concentrate on a dayjob or anything like that?

We live alone – under the bridge like Red Hot Chili Peppers. That is why we are gay!!! And Uinona Rider has to sell his own body to live. And I have somebody to love!

What inspired you to write the song “Tricycles Of Steel”? What do you think of motorcycles – are they not true enough for a band like Nanowar?

(everybody laughs) “Tricycle Of Steel” was written because I had a tricycle… a barbie tricycle… a pink barbie tricycle… a gay pink barbie tricycle. But then the saddle broke up, and I had to remove it. I think tricycles are much much much more true than motorcycles. Motorcyclists always go like this: (imitates the sound of a motorcycle engine) “I’m a cool man, I have a motorcycle!” But a true man doesn’t need all this. (imitates the sound of an engine again) A true man has his own ass, he doesn’t need any motor. He who makes such noises is not a true man.

The next qu

estion is related to the lyrics of your song “Gioca True”. Why is pizza better than happy meal? And how do you cook a true metal pizza?

Ohhh, that’s a true metal question! (everybody cracks) But unfortunately, we cannot cook… (this is followed by a lively discussion in the background, half in English, half in Italian, but that’s too remote to hear anything)

Now let’s discuss another song off the latest album – “The Triumphant March Of The Nanowarrior”. Where do you find forests of steel in Italy? And what dangers do you encounter there, so that you have to take a great sword with you?

I’ve got just one thing to say – we have the great swords of steel. Yeah, we have real great swords of the warriors of the king of true metal.

A question for Gatto (guitarist) – you say your hobby is studying mathematics and physics, so do the fact that you know the chemical composition of metal help you when you write true metal music?

Well, it helps me a lot. Steel isn’t a real metal, as you may think. It contains 4 percent of carbon. I believe that we should talk more about iron and nickel and other elements that are really metal. They are more metal than steel.

Gatto and Potowotominimak (vocals) are also responsible for the cover and all the images in the booklet of “Other Bands Play, Nanowar Gay”. How long have you been painting? Did you go to school or college to study painting, or are you self-taught artists?

Yes, I’ve been to a school of ass-drawing. We fix a brush inside our penis to make the cover of our album the truest drawing of all time! That’s the way we also drew covers for Emerson Lake And Palmer, Eros Ramazotti and Papa Roach. Pravda!!!

You always say that you are very serious in your music, but what do you think about the bands that make fun of heavy metal cliches? I am talking about such bands as GWAR or Spinal Tap or Carnival In Coal…

We don’t know any of these bands. I personally adore Anal Cunt because of the lyrics, which are the best lyrics ever written by a human being. We love many bands that come from Italy, such as Jesus Christ Supercar.

By the way, have you watched the latest Eurovision song contest? What do you think of its winner, the band Lordi?

We never watch any song contest. We watch porno movies! But Uinona Rider won a porno contest, because he had the largest penis!

But if Nanowar were to represent Italy at Eurovision, what kind of song would you play and what kind of show would you do?

We would play a new song, it is a very true song, and it is the only song from which you can understand what we don’t mean. That is why we would play it. Or we would play an old song from our first album, released in 1984, when we were not born yet. This is the

truest song ever!

What are you going to do if a lawyer representing Manowar or Metallica shows up at your door one day and demands money for using Manowar or Metallica songs without their permission?

We don’t know such a thing as money. We are so poor that we live under a bridge with just a personal computer and our recording studio, the truest recording studio ever! I guess we will just ask Uinona to cook something for them with a cock!

And what do you think about people who use your songs without your permission? I am talking about mp3 sharing and copying CDs. Are these people posers, or can they still be considered true in some cases?

It is very true to share our mp3s. You share true metal with other people, and this is true! We are not in fear of piracy, and we are so glad that people steal our music, because… this is true!

Since you now have a contract with the Russian record label, are you planning to re-release your previous albums on it? They are pretty hard to get in this country…

No, because they suck. They really suck ass, and we are not planning to do anything like that. We have much better stuff that we are producing, and “Other Bands Play, Nanowar Gay!!” contains better songs than we recorded on our previous albums.

And what can you say about the next album you’re already working on? How much will it be different from “Other Bands Play, Nanowar Gay!!”?

The title will be different, of course! (everybody laughs) It will be called “Other Bands Play, Nanowar Heterosexual!!” We already have two new songs, which are really true, and if you ever come to see our shows, you will hear them and you will see that we are more true than ever!

Are you hoping to surpass what you achieved with the song “Power Of The Power Of the Power (Of The Great Sword)”, or will this song will always remain Nanowar’s masterpiece?

Yes, we agree that it is our best song ever! It is the longest song ever written, and we would play that on the Eurovision contest! (everybody laughs)

And in general, what goals do you have when you are writing music? Are you interested in making Nanowar famous to more people, in getting on the radio or TV, or do you just write because it’s true and you can’t do without it?

It’s nice to drive around Italy and visit foreign countries and play just what we want to play. We try to make our albums as cheap as possible, because we don’t care much about money and such things, we just want to have fun. And we also really want to get some dicks, fresh dicks!

And finally, please say a few words to true metal people of Russia!

Ohh, true metal people of Russia! (a tape of the Russian national anthem is played in the background, and the guys try to sing something along) This is our new song, it is called “Power Of The Power Of The Power Of The Great Sword Part 2”! (everybody on the floor laughing) You cannot hear the whole song yet, but this is the introduction!

Interview by Ksenia “Wolfin” Khorina, Natalie “Lynx” Khorina
Questions also composed by Roman “Maniac” Patrashov
May 30, 2006
11 авг 2006 the End

Nanowar of Steel

Triumphant March of Nanowarriors